The Substatic monthly: April 2024

Dispatches from Hell Island

It’s that time of the month again, and what an absolutely chocka 30 days it’s been. Not so much on the gaming front as I’ve been busy on any number of writing projects recently not to mention the dreaded day job, but there’s a lot of ground to cover nonetheless, so lets get to it.

GAMES

LIL GATOR GAME

A really sweet and wholesome little adventure game that’s riffing very heavily on titles like A Short Hike and various Zeldas. Lil Gator Game’s big unique selling point however is that it’s a game about a game, the facade of the facade is brilliantly realized here.

Your foes are cardboard cutouts, your treasures pockets of confetti and an array of big colourful plastic toys. The bulk of the game involves building up a castle town around the communal playground on your island, every kid therein playing along with the illusion that this is one big grand adventure. Really good fun.

BOTANY MANOR

I like detective games that make me feel smart and Botany Manor is a detective game that makes me feel smart. A really tight, concise experience with an excellent setting and a great set of puzzles to unravel. I’ve never been more invested in getting a stupid plant to grow.

HAROLD HALIBUT

I haven’t played enough of this to give it a proper summation, but I still wanted to write about how bloody gorgeous this stop motion adventure game is. Wallace and Gromit meets broken age as you navigate the bowels of a stranded space ship aeons from Earth, with a colourful cast of characters to engage with along the way.

The gameplay itself borders a bit on glacial and I just don’t have the proper time to get into it right now but I’m grateful for the lunatics out there who dedicated over a decade of their lives to making this. A+ for effort.

FILMS

I’ve seen so many good films this month that I just can’t pick 3, so I’m going to try to sum each one up in a few sentances or less:

PORTRAIT OF A LADY ON FIRE

There simply isn’t a better doomed love story out there, a perfect parcel of tortured yearning with some brilliant performances at its centre and probably the best editing of any film this side of Fury Road.

EVIL DOES NOT EXIST

Ryusuke Hamaguchi has made a deeply fucked up film that you only really realise is deeply fucked several hours after leaving the cinema. I will be chewing on this one for years to come.

ALICE IN THE CITIES

Boy the 70s really was a different era, wasn’t it? Sure, lady I’ve just met, I’ll take your child to another country while you go fight your demons! Wim Wenders is a cool director, this was rad.

POSSESSION

I’ve spent the last few years being inundated with GIFs of Isabel Adjani having a bad time on the underground and now that I finally have the context for it: jesus christ. The most rotten, bad vibes film i’ve ever seen, which sadly becomes a complete mess in it’s final act, which is a shame because it is dangerously compelling up until that point.

CHALLENGERS

The horniest film of the year, Luca Guadagnino’s latest is a celebration of the beauty of the human body and the inherent ugliness of jealous feelings. Obsene, pornographic melodrama set to one of the hardest soundtracks I’ve ever heard. Believe the hype.

CITY HUNTER

Unfamiliar with the source material, I went into this expecting dumb action and what I found was a howlingly funny comedy with some surprisingly decent action bits in between. A brilliantly realised anime adapatation with an incredibly charming lead.

EMILY THE CRIMINAL

Aubrey Plaza you are so beautiful and such a talent. This is basically Breaking Bad condensed down to a tight 90. A must watch in my eyes.

MUSIC

RAT TAXI - LOUIE ZONG

Simple, unapologetic, funky. A cool album

CHALLENGERS - TRENT REZNOR AND ATTICUS ROSS

It’s like if Shoji Meguro made a Matrix soundtrack, but its for a film about bisexuals playing tennis. So fucking good I hear it in my sleep.

MISSIONS - THE TOXIC AVENGER

Took a couple of goes to properly get into, but this is a class bit of EDM and more than makes up for the fact that the new Justice album is a bit dissapointing.

BOOKS

DRUNKEN BAKER - BARNEY FARMER

I’m not the target audience for Viz magazine, although I have encountered it from time to time. My brother bought this for me for christmas and I was expecting something purile and funny. What I got was a lot sadder and a lot more poetic.

A really disarming ghost story about the old world now dead and buried, in its place a cheaper, nastier, more gut churning one. A bit of a bad hang, if i’m totally honest, but incredibly well written

THE FEAR INDEX - ROBERT HARRIS

A fun, schlocky techno-thriller about an AI fucking with dickhead billionaires. Another christmas present I went into not really knowing what to expect, and the result was very entertaining. I have a space in my heart for these kinds of books, even if they aren’t my normal cup of tea.